back on the wagon

Well what can I say, my name is Lizzy and I am overweight. I have been on every diet imaginable, the latest one being South Beach and they all have failed. I guess I'm what you call an "overeater." Yes, that describes me. My life revolves around food and it always has. I wake up and the first thing I want to know is what I'm having for breakfast. Every time I eat during the day I wonder how many calories it is or how much I will gain from the meal or snack. You see, I used to be the fat kid. I was 5' 5 or 6" and 175 pounds. That is quite alot I know but this was only up until 9th grade. After that I slowly began losing the weight until 11th grade when I got to my losest of 145 lbs and 5'7", not too bad I guess but I did always want to be thinner. I'm really not sure how I lost the weight. I'm not sure if it was diet, excercise, or the fact that I was bulimic for a good year. I just had to be thin. The year after I graduated high school I stopped worrying so much about what I ate and slowing put on a little weight, maybe from all the drinking I did. I had a bad breakup or two and before I knew it I was up to 170 pounds last January, didn't even see it coming! I began obsessing over weight and exercising and I got down to 164 pounds, a size 10 which is bearable I guess, but not the size 4 or 6 I once was. Now I'm 158 pounds and still a size 10... still a little over weight. I think my ideal weight is 145, I just don't know how to get there without throwing up. I failed at South Beach, couldn't deal with no carbs. And now here I am, maybe this will help me... my journey begins... I'm going to lose the 13 pounds and even though I still have the urge to throw up every day, I'm going to try to do this the healthy way, good eating!